Abbey’s Antics!

The following selections are from my Facebook page.  The Antics of our new puppy have been amusing quite a few of my friends and their friends.  So, I have picked out the best of the postings and put them here… In Abbey’s Antics.  But, first an introduction to Abbey Gale Prosciutto.  Abbey was suppose to be a pure bred German Shepherd, But…  Apparently, the local Schnauzer “about Town,” got to mom before German Shepherd dad did.  Which probably accounts for all of her antics!  Abbey and I hope you enjoy the snippets and chuckles from her young life.

Abbey Displays Election Day… Neglect.        The mom left the farm in the dark yesterday. And, was not seen by the light of day! Where was she! Where did she go! Oh, What to do!(in the middle of 200 acres). Abbey was at a loss! Who would be her friend! Who would help her fill her lonely sad day… Auntie Lady!!!! Off we went into the weeds… around the lake… anywhere we wanted!   It was dark when the mom’s truck rolled to a stop. With a pat upon three heads, the mom dragged to the human house door. The 13 hours at the polls as a precinct clerk were over! The mind was numb and the body was tired. A thump on the front door and the mom slowly moved off the couch to open it.

In slid a happy Abbey Pup! The mom was not so tired as not to feel a face full of dried mud and stickers! The body smelled of dead and dying fish! OMG! A farm field trip was smeared all over her body!! With only the energy to think about giving her a shower, the mom went to eat a bowl of soup. Then, put all pups to bed at 10, and found her bed, too. 15 years as a precinct clerk and nothing else mattered but bed!  Like Scarlett O’Hara, I would deal with Abbey and everything else….Tomorrow!!!!

Abbey takes a …..          Well, this morning was all I could take! I have the kitchen, the kitchen floor, the bathroom floor and many other things awaiting my attention… Yesterday was spent the way I was…Spent!    So when Jim drove off to Georgetown and the pups were fed, Abbey had to come in. She lay down on the floor beside me as I finished my coffee. Of course, she was damp from toe nails to belly from the wet grass. That was when I realized that my biggest clean up was not any of the above!  The smell of dead fish was too much!  Sooooo, without a bathtub in the house, Abbey took A Shower!!!!

Abbey Our First Line of Defense!
Last night a loud thump hit the back door. Abbey wanted in and she wanted in Now! With her back to me, barking into the blackness of the night, Abbey stood splay leged on the top step of the porch. With the opening of the back door, she streaked past me in a fast trot that would have made a pacer proud… Growling all the way down the hall she hit the living room, stared at the human who is not mom sitting in his recliner. When he made no move to go with her, she spun around, paced past me in the hall and came to a screeching halt at the back door. With all this growling and posturing of a military K-9, I had to see if I needed to pull my gun and help in defense of hearth and home!
There, coming out of the darkness, with the rolling gait of a great white  polar bear was “Uncle Dakota!” The darkness wasn’t even dark since we have night 2 lights  lighting the area.  But, with adrenaline pumping, Abbey was not sure that this was not a great bear dressed up as her uncle… After all, Holloween was tomorrow.  Uncle Dakota was to tired to fight for the porch so he just stood at the bottom of the porch steps. His attitude was, “oh, now what, pup!” I had to go out and call him up.
Oh, was Abbey embarrassed! She licked his muzzle, telling him he should not have sneaked up on her like that! Of course it did not help that the mom was laughing so hard she that she could hardly breathe…. The mom would break into Abbey Gales of laughter throughout the rest of the evening!

Abbey in the Mystery of the disappearing water…
Over the past several weeks, Jim and I have been washing out the water bowl on our porch. We were finding it in a new and strange condition… It was almost empty, surrounded by dispersed water and slimy with mud, as if the big dogs were washing their faces in it! Since Lady has been the only digger we have, this was a new move on her part.
The following pictures have helped solved the mystery, but we have never caught the culprit in action! Someone has been caught with wet paws, chest, and face! Guess Who!!

Abbey stars in ….
Since Abbey has grown so much, she can no longer sit/lay on me in the recliner. Therefore, I have had to relocate to the couch recliner so she can sleep next to me.
Abbey’s preferred position is with her feet into the back of the couch and her head and back to the edge. I have tried to turn her several times with no success. So, as a mom, I hold her back feet to keep her secure. Well, the other night with her long legs braced to the back of the couch, she fell asleep. I was holding her back legs in place while I was watching a show. Before I could catch her, her head, shoulders and body slithered down to the floor. I let go of her hind feet.  She landed with a heavy thump! She never missed a breath, never woke up and continued the Sleep of the Dead Dog!

Abbey’s New Game… Bobbing for Bones!
Yesterday afternoon was boring until Abbey grabbed one of her smoked chews and went outside on the porch for a drink. Holding the chew in her mouth she leaned over the water bowl to drink… in went the chew! Well, opening her mouth to grab the chew she came up for air and dripping water! Shaking her head and clearing her mouth, she stared into the water bow and at her chew covered in 6 inches of water. After another try, she began drinking the water down. Then, she stepped aside and let Lady drink. And, made another attempt at diving for chews! She drank some more and tried again!  Jim and I had been watching from the back door.  I could not take it anymore… It was time for a mom intervention! I retrieved her soggy chew!  Which, by the way, was softened to the right chewing consistency. So, maybe that was Abbey’s plan all along!

Abbey conquers …
Yesterday was a day of firsts! Yesterday morning, read 7:30 am, Abbey came bounding into the kitchen after a successful climb up “Everest,” the dark basement stairs. With her “Sherpa” behind her telling her to go on… And, the mom was in the kitchen calling, “Come on, Abbey! You can do it!” Abbey conquered “Everest!”
Amid the celebration pats and praises of “Good Job,” the mom took her good smelling hot stuff, read coffee, into her chair and set it down on an end table. Turning to the triumphant Abbey sitting between her feet, she leaned down and said, “Are you hun………gry! The gap in between was filled with action. Two paws hit the mom’s shoulders as she leaned down and a very Hairy Nose went in and out of her mouth in a split second!    YUKKK!!!   Another first for the mom!